Depression Diaries (Post 2)
If you look around see someone who looks sad, they may be just that – sad. Life is full of ups and downs so it is natural for our moods to adjust to different circumstances. Feeling down in the dumps from time to time and grieving is normal (NHS U.K, n.d; Winch, 2015). It is when sadness turns into something more gradually, the inner demon depression is born in yet another victim.
A common misconception is depressed sufferers have monotonous personalities. However, it is a complicated emotional state that affects people behaviours differently. Someone who is depressed may loathe themselves, feel helpless, hopeless and upset (Mind.org.uk, 2016) although, the extent of what is felt and how they act varies.
A mildly depressed person can get through daily life holding down a job or running a family home. Whilst, a clinically depressed individual struggles to get through each day and may live a double life. Sustaining a double life for some is just too much to handle. In the U.K and Ireland alone, more than 6,000 people commit suicide, ISAP cited in (Mental Health Foundation, 2017).
My last post touched upon that the disease does not exhibit in one stereotypical face. Depression can pursue your colleague or peer – the person you admire most or even decide to seek you. No one should believe they are immune from the black fogs wrath. Unfortunately, 1 in 10 people in England will suffer from clinical depression in their lifetime (NHS U.K, 2016) but many more go undiagnosed. Even those with diagnoses may still conceal it because they believe their curse will be a burden on others…
If you aren’t aware of the hidden signs of depression it is easy to overlook requesting help for yourself or a loved one in need. After all, how can you notice something you don’t understand? This post is to help you reflect on yours and others’ behaviour, to identify whether symptoms are apparent, to gain support to manage and relieve them.
7 Secret Signs of Depression (Part 1)
A depressed person will try their best to avoid social activities. Periods of silent isolation is one of the main signs that an individual is being tortured by depression. When someone becomes depressed it is not unusual for them to lose interest in everything and everyone. Where he or she may have once been the party starter, now they are the party pooper and may even call into work sick.
They may still make plans with you, trying to keep up the ‘happy’ pretence. However, in reality they have turned into ‘king’ or ‘queen’ bail’. Someone who consistently lets you down is likely to be suffering from depression.
When you realise you were lied to it is hard to trust the person who lied to you. Yet, it is unlikely you will taste dishonesty from depressed people – they are semi-professional liars.
They have the skill of making up believable cover stories on the spot for pretty much anything. Lies could be to hide how they got scars on their body (when they have had a self-harming sesh) to an excuse of why they need to leave somewhere rapidly. Although, they mastered lying tell-tale signs of their illness is that they have an answer for EVERYTHING and are very defensive.
3. Mean Girl… or Boy
A depressed person over analyses themselves and others people obsessively. They do this is because they are so unhappy with their appearance and/or personality that they begin to look for what they desire in others. At the same time when that individual finds traits in someone else they despise in themselves they give off the impression over being over judgemental and a royal b*tch. From experience, chances are that b*tch is extremely insecure and depressed too.
4. Conversation Changes
A closed book who avoids expressing their feelings and subjects is likely to be depressed. Of course, it is possible that he or she will bleed out their feelings but usually this in a philosophical manner. If you find yourself or a loved one turning the conversation to life or death, or what the route is to a happier life and no philosophy or R.E books have been studied. Then, you are certainly hearing little indicators of depression.
5. Substance Abuse Perceptions
We all know drugs are bad – right? Not exactly. A depressed person views substances differently to a healthy one. I want you to think of your favourite food, – could you live without it? If someone is a user they see them as necessities to get through the next day. Even if they’re not a user, they may consider it as a viable option to wash away their pain… to be happy again (even if they know it’s temporary).
6. The Mechanisms of Intense Feelings
A person masking depression will often feel emotions more intensely than others. Do you find yourself or know someone whom bursts out in floods of tears watching television over a scene that isn’t sad? Or see red about something trivial like someone overtaking them in a shop queue or in traffic? Well that is personifying the clouds of gloom. The only way some depressed suffers know how to channel their depression is through anger and irritability (Koh et al., 2002).
7. *Incoming* Triple Threat…
Failure, Rejection and Abandonment. The three ingredients a depressed person wishes their mind could shield. There is nothing worse than finding out someone you love cannot handle your worse layer. The fear or rejection and abandonment forges the need to be secretive so they don’t walk away. If you or someone else strongly fears the triple threat, then you may be depressed.
So, there we have it guys, 7 secret signs of depression unveiled. I hope you found it useful whether you think you or a loved one may be suffering from the condition.
Do you think you or a loved one could have depression?
Depression UK: Supports those suffering from depression
Samaritans UK: A helpline for those who feels heavy distress or suicidal. The helpline does not show up on phone bills also.
116 223 – Free helpline (My personal favourite)
08457 90 90 90*
*This number still works to get through for Samaritans but you will be charged for the call.
SaneLine: (6pm-11pm, open every day of the year) provides support to those suffering from mental health problems)
Young Minds (Under 25 years old): A UK based charity committed to improving children and young people’s mental health.
020 7089 5050
National Suicide Prevention Helpline
National Adolescent Suicide Helpline
Over to You
Can you think of more hidden signs of Depression? – If yes, why not share them below?
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I would love if you shared my post to raise awareness of some of the hidden signs of Depression.
About the Author
My name is Morgan Isabella Shaw a warrior of clinical depression. To find out more about my story click here.
Coming UP Next…
Behind the Brave Face: 7 More Secret Signs of Depression (Part 2)
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Thanks for reading
Koh KB, Kim CH, Park JK (2002) ‘Predominance of anger in depressive disorders compared with anxiety disorders and somatoform disorders’. Journal of Clinical Psychiatry; 63: 486–92.
OpenUrlMental Health Foundation. (2017). Suicide. [online] Available at: https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/a-to-z/s/suicide [Accessed 21 Sep. 2017].
Mind.org.uk (2016). Symptoms | Mind, the mental health charity – help for mental health problems. [online] Available at: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/depression/symptoms/#.WcOdoZWWzIU [Accessed 21 Sep. 2017].
NHS U.K. (2016). Clinical depression – NHS Choices. [online] Available at: http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Depression/Pages/Introduction.aspx [Accessed 21 Sep. 2017].
NHS U.K. (N.d). Dealing with grief and loss – NHS Choices. [online] Available at: http://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/emotionalhealth/Pages/Dealingwithloss.aspx [Accessed 21 Sep. 2017].
Winch (2015). Psychology Today. The Important Difference Between Sadness and Depression. [online] Available at: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-squeaky-wheel/201510/the-important-difference-between-sadness-and-depression [Accessed 21 Sep. 2017].